


Waking Up Naked in the Denny's Parking Lot

by labocat



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Gen, M/M, denny's au, don't look at me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-03
Updated: 2014-01-03
Packaged: 2018-01-07 06:35:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1116647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/labocat/pseuds/labocat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>No one goes to Denny's. You end up at Denny's.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waking Up Naked in the Denny's Parking Lot

**Author's Note:**

> Some of this actually happened.

Most nights Erwin doesn’t mind working late. Making sure the job gets done is always important, and making sure his clients are happy is even more so.

It’s just more than a little annoying when “working late” turns into finally stumbling out of the office at two in the morning, the security guards giving him a sympathetic look as they set alarms behind him.

Only after he gets in his car does Erwin realize that he. Is. _Starving._ Finishing up the project had been strenuous, and he hadn’t even thought about food once he’d sat down with a cup of coffee. It was only thanks to his coworkers keeping his mug full that he’d even ingested anything today. Blearily, stomach churning, he thinks about what food is currently in his apartment and sighs. Procrastinating on going grocery shopping may have meant more time to collapse after work, but at some point, all the food ran out. 

But what was open at two in the morning? 

Like a sign from some higher power, as he turns the corner, he sees it.

The glowing yellow sign of Denny’s.

There was only one car in the parking lot aside from a smattering of cars at the back that were likely employee’s, but the lights were on. Greasy or not, likely to give him indigestion or not, Denny’s looked open, and By Jove, Erwin was going to go to Denny’s.

Until he walks up to the door and sees a kid ride past on a bicycle.

It’s late, it’s been a long day, and he has got to be hallucinating. No way did a Denny’s staff member just ride a bicycle down the aisle. Erwin stops, hand still outstretched towards the handle and stares. But the bicycle doesn’t reappear, so he just shakes his head and pushes the door open, a jingling bell that is way too happy for this hour announcing his arrival. There’s no one else in the restaurant aside from some guy way over in the corner...and what is definitely not a hallucination still riding a bike. Towards him. 

“Uhhh. Are you open?” The door hadn’t been locked, and he was pretty sure Denny’s was supposed to be 24 hours, but there was still a chance that maybe, just maybe, he’d just fallen asleep at his desk and this was all an elaborate dream. It’d be so much easier.

The kid on the bike pops the front wheel off the ground, feet moving back to balance on the pegs on the back tire Erwin only notices now, hops the bike a bit, and glares at him. “No, I just left the door unlocked to collect more unwitting victims for a ritual sacrifice.” He jumps off the bike from the back and leans it against one of the booths. “So, do you want a table, or did you just get so distracted by my sweet-ass skills that you were drawn to this shit-hole?” 

If looks could kill, Erwin’s pretty sure he’d be more than six feet under at this point, but somehow his mouth is still working, because he can hear his voice saying, “I didn’t know they let kids work this late.”

It’s definitely the wrong thing because the kid’s scowl deepens to the point that Erwin’s sure his face will stay stuck like that. Then it breaks and he shrugs, waving a hand at Erwin. “Whatever, old man, pick a table, I don’t care. I’m gonna go get some coffee; I’ve gotta stay alert for my pole dancing shift in an hour - yell if you want some.” Erwin doesn’t even get a chance to parse that sentence before he’s gone, wheeling the bike back to the back. Erwin just sits down, opening the menu on autopilot and definitely _not_ thinking about the kid dancing on a pole and trying to figure out whether there’d been a double entendre in there. 

He’s absolutely sure the kid is mocking him by the time he walks over to his booth, though there’s no way Erwin will admit he thinks that there’s an extra sway in his hips as he does, and especially won’t admit that he thinks it’s for him.

“Relax, old man, unclench your jaw. You’re gonna get a heart attack from the food anyways, so you might as well know I’m way of-age; don’t have a heart attack over being a pedo. I’m too old for that shit. Way too old to still be working here, in fact. I’d make better tips as a pole dancer.”

It’s all Erwin can do to not blurt out that he’d make a good pole dancer. Because really, _who says things like that_? Instead, he’s sure his dentist will have a thing or two to tell him about how tense his jaw is.

He just croaks out, “a moon over my hammy with no eggs and no ham. Please,” he adds as an afterthought, still trying to drag his attention from the thought of the kid - no, guy - on a pole.

“Seriously? What a weirdo.”

“Says the guy riding a bike inside his workplace.”

The guy snorts, eyes flicking back to the corner where the sole other occupant is. “No one’s here at this hour - I’ve gotta do _something_ so I don’t die of bordem; Old Man Pixis doesn’t count - he’s here more than I am, and that’s sad.” A pause, as he stares down Erwin.  “Whatever, one grilled cheese coming right up. 

The guy disappears into the back, and thankfully doesn’t reappear until he’s got the plate with the grilled cheese, not even to practice more tricks or judge him for being here in the first place. Erwin’s beginning to realize that bell’s main purpose. 

He drops the plate without saying anything and turns around to head back to the kitchen, scowl firmly back in place. Erwin wants to blame it on the hour and his tiredness, he really does, but it’s pure, sober curiosity that makes him blurt out, “What’s your name?”

The lack of nametag is a little strange, but everything about tonight has been strange. Under the guy’s gaze, Erwin feels like he’s being examined; the highest government scrutiny couldn’t buy a gaze this designed to make someone uncomfortable.

Erwin’s more than half expecting the guy to just turn around and go back to the kitchen and he’ll just have to find out from the receipt, when the guy says, “Levi. Unless you’re actually going to fill out one of those stupid comment cards, in which case my name’s Hanji.” And then he is gone, and Erwin’s left with just his grilled cheese and Pixis’s laughter.

**Author's Note:**

> There will be more. Terrifyingly more. If I'm going to hell, I'm going to make it /worth/ it, damnit. Also rating will fluctuate and may even get up to E at some point.
> 
> If the tables are clean enough.


End file.
